Commenting on the comments…

A couple of comments left on my blog in the last 24hrs (thank you) which I thought I would highlight and comment on myself. The first was this…

I can relate to a great female orgasm from my tongue. Last session before her period, I gave her a great orgasm and she has bragged about it a couple of times since then. Makes me feel so powerful when this happens! My only complaint is that she will not kiss me afterwards! I would love to rim her, but she doesn’t seem keen on that… yet.

I’m intrigued to know whether she bragged about it to you or to someone else, but either way… nice job! One great thing about chastity is that it doesn’t take long for it to click that only one of you is having orgasms and so you are both working towards a common goal…her pleasure! For the guy, at least for me and lovetosubmit, it is so spectacularly rewarding to feel your Mistress cum really hard. It is a truly wonderful feeling, better than any orgasm for me. Incidentally, Mistress has just gone upstairs to bed and when she kissed me goodnight she told me that her orgasm earlier was spectacular. That makes me feel pretty flipping great I can tell you!!! 

I just love it, but it can be difficult for a new Mistress not to feel guilty at first, because she has to get used to having sex in a whole different way than she probably has her whole life, so for those of you who persuade your wife to take the first steps you really need to keep up the reassurances while she adjusts. Make no mistake it can be a long process. 

It’s a shame she doesn’t like to kiss you after you’ve licked her pussy, I love kissing Mistress deeply as she teases my cock after making her cum, I don’t get to kiss her after rimming though…

Rimming can be tricky, I remember the first time I brought it up with Mistress R, as clear as day I remember it and the look of distaste on her face. Strangely, it was one thing that I had done with my previous (sexually ambivalent) girlfriend, so maybe the fact that I was able to tell Mistress that I already knew what it was like and that I liked doing it helped to lay the foundations….I don’t really know. 

Maybe the fact that I had done it with my previous girlfriend acted as a kind of catalyst too, after all new girlfriends/wives maybe don’t like to think that their predecessors did something ‘better’ or maybe Mistress just thought that the fact that I brought it up made her think that I must have enjoyed it and that there was no harm in trying.

To this day I don’t really know how Mistress R feels about me licking her ass, I think she kind of likes it now, but I’m not 100% sure. I hope she does. Out of session I usually have to prompt it, but I don’t know whether that’s because she’s not that bothered or whether she still can’t quite understand why I love it so much, or maybe she just likes to make me beg for it?s 

The point is lovetosubmit, don’t give up, but don’t pester. Tell her how much you would love to be allowed to lick her gorgeous ass every so often and maybe you will persuade her to try it eventually, and maybe when she does she will love it. 

As much as I love licking Mistress R’s beautiful pussy (and I really, really love it) there is something really special about being allowed to tongue her ass. It’s totally submissive, incredibly erotic, kind of naughty, and just… you can’t get any closer to someone than licking their ass can you? It’s totally awesome.

Incidentally, Mistress allowed me to briefly lick her ass tonight, but only for about 10-15 seconds. My cock was rock hard by the time she finished teasing me tonight, I can tell you!

The other comment was this one…

Twenty four days teasing and denial.I can’t imagine this. 7 days without sex is TOO long for me. Although, we are not in flr, and 7 days it’s a lot. I have a qestion: when i don’t cum for 3-5 days, i can’t last long. And i think nobody can. If your mistress want long sex, how you resolve the problem?

This is an issue that has caused me untold (but seemingly unnecessary) worry over the last few years, and is (I suspect) a pitfall that many chastity males fall into. In my particular case this deserves some explanation, so…

One of the things which attracted me to the chastity lifestyle was an article I read in which an older gentleman said that chastity helped him adapt to the rigours of old age, and helped him continue his physical relationship with his wife as his cock got less reliable. 

Now, a few years ago I was having some very stressful ED issues, and once you get into that it’s really hard to get out of. The stress of not knowing if you will be able to get hard or stay hard just defeats you over and over, because you can’t help thinking about it and even though there may not be a physical reason for it, the minute you start worrying about it you are toast. However, since we started full time chastity you could count on the fingers of one, maybe two hands the number of times I’ve been unable to get hard. 

Bearing that in mind, when I brought up the subject of full time chastity (which was not easy in the slightest and Mistress R was initially not a happy bunny I can assure you…) she decided to insist that if I really wanted her to be in control then she was going to make some rules of her own. Now I don’t think for a minute that Mistress thought that we would still be doing this three and half years later, she probably didn’t think I’d stick it for more than a month or two, but she made two rules which are still in force now.

1) I am not allowed to ask to be allowed to cum.
2) I am not allowed to instigate penetrative sex.

I don’t really know why she initiated rule number one, I’m guessing it was to make it easier for her to get used to the idea without having to deal with guilt from me begging to be allowed to cum. But number two, I’m sure, stemmed from the awful times we had when I couldn’t get or stay hard. I think she thought that by taking that on herself she could decide if she thought I was hard enough to have penetrative sex.
Funnily enough since I have been in chastity that hasn’t really been a problem… but what has happened in the past is that I’ve worried myself in circles about why (now that ED is not an issue anymore) Mistress doesn’t seemingly want penetrative sex as often as I thought she would. And that’s a bit of a blow to the ego for a guy… you know! 
I still sometimes worry that in the future this will come back to bite me in the ass and she will say something like ‘I went along with the whole chastity thing because it was what you wanted’ etc etc… But in all honesty, I’ve asked plenty of times if she’s happy with the way things are, whether she wants to go back to a normal vanilla sex life, I really can’t do any more. She is in control of our sex life at the end of the day, if she’s not happy with it she is the one who needs to change it, or needs to tell me that she’s not happy so that we can change it together. With my situation, I have to believe that things are the way she wants them to be and that includes penetrative sex (or the lack thereof).
Mistress does let me inside her sometimes, mostly with her on top, which is great for me because I find it quite easy not to lose control being ridden. Sometimes she does allow me on top, though not that often, and usually because she wants me to cum hard inside her. You are right, when in chastity for any length of time it is not easy to fuck hard and fast for very long, not easy at all, especially if your Mistress’s asshole is in plain view as you are sliding into her….  !
So the truth is I don’t really have an answer as to how we overcome this. Mistress seemingly much prefers oral sex, and this in itself can take between 15-30 minutes for her to cum. Fortunately I love licking her pussy, so we are both very content. I can’t deny that there are times when I really miss being the one on top, slamming my cock into her as hard and fast as I can, but on balance what I have gained far outweighs what I have lost. 
Now that I have accepted that Mistress doesn’t feel like she is missing out (on long lasting penetrative sex) as she has told me many times, it has changed my perspective a bit. Yes there is still the odd time when I wish I could pin Mistress’s legs back to her chest and fuck her hard, until I fill her full of cum… but really when you enter into a situation like this, you come to accept that you have given up that control and ability to lead and make choices. 
It’s kind of hard to explain… but as time goes on you realise how much more rewarding sex is with someone when you know that they are comfortable with everything that is happening and when it is happening. When Mistress allows me inside her then I know she really wants me to be inside her, when she allows me to cum I know she really wants me to cum and so on. 
I know most people who read my blog are already on-board with the whole chastity thing, but I really can’t emphasise enough that our sex life in the past 3.5 years has been better than at any point in our 22 year relationship.  I wouldn’t even swap it for the first flush of all night fucking, cumming three or four times and going to sleep at four in the morning. Yes that was great, but it wasn’t as good as this is now. Not really.


One thought on “Commenting on the comments…

  1. it requires diiicplsne or a device. Hopefully a device that is cheat proof. If you are in chastity you really don’t have a choice unless you cheat and if that’s the case you’re just not ready for a female-led relationship IMO. In my assignment programs orgasm is not permitted unless earned. They go through sometimes long periods without orgasm. If someone is a chronic wanker and needs firm orgasm control then I may start with a few days at a time. But I believe that they should be willing to make that sacrifice without playing games or cheating. If they find it too hard then a device must be purchased and worn.

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