Joe left a comment on my August 15th Femdom Session post asking ‘Where can I find a wife like yours, you are both incredibly lucky?’
Well Joe, the answer to that is of course ‘I don’t know’.
But my guess is that you will be naturally drawn to women with slightly dominant personalities, as was I, even before I really knew I wanted to be submissive. But basically in my case it was down to luck and a lot of hard work and most importantly of all patience.
My first piece of advice would be perhaps to think about your own attitude. I don’t see many men living my lifestyle who spend every night out with the boys, most of them in fact seem to spend as much time as possible with their wives. Most of them seem to be in relationships with women who they want to spend their time with, and who they view as their best friend.
If you think about it, when you finally spring the surprise (no matter how gently or gradually, depending on how far you want to go) your partner’s first reaction is probably going to be to pull back. As in, ‘Oh shit, what the hell…. I thought I knew this person’. The question will be, whether their next response is to move on to someone else or if they value you enough to ‘try it’.
If you can get them to ‘try it’, and you don’t fuck it up by starting off asking her to ‘piss in your mouth…’, chances are you’ll be okay. But this is where the ‘patience’ element comes in, don’t expect to be locked in chastity, whipped, paddled and butt-fucked within the first couple of months.
Not saying it’s impossible, but you’ll be very lucky if you find a woman who genuinely drives the situation. For most of us it’s a case of slow and steady, tempering your expectations, reassurance and being genuine.
I’d be interested to hear from any of my readers how they ‘broached’ the subject with their partners and how things progressed.