Initiating Chastity…

‘Potential submissive’, one of my new readers, left a comment yesterday where he said that he’s in a relationship which incorporates foot worship/spanking/domination but as yet he’s not worked up the courage to broach the subject of chastity.

I think this is a really hard thing to bring up not least because most women just won’t understand the point or why you would want it. It’s a long time since we had ‘that conversation’ and even though we were in a ‘part time’ chastity marriage, taking it to the level it is now was not a smooth ride.

If I were you, I would try and introduce it gradually. First off I would suggest making her cum, but not asking for anything in return. Make it about her pleasure. Then eventually you can maybe tell her how much you enjoy going to sleep denied, knowing that she is satisfied. I would really stay away from the whole issue of chastity cages and all that until you have laid the ground work and she’s on-board with the idea. Who knows, she might even jump at the chance once she’s worked out the benefits for ‘her’.

My Mistress never liked the idea of a chastity cage, and we’ve been doing this for six years now, and I haven’t made myself cum once. So it can be done, if you want it bad enough. True, I don’t feel I am getting the same experience as those who are genuinely locked, I can’t deny that at all and at times I would dearly love to know how it feels to be locked and desperately horny with my cock crushed inside an unforgiving cage. I also love the idea of the ‘points of intrigue’… but having tried on a cock cage I have to say that it was laughably impractical for me. I don’t know if it’s because I am on the portly side, and there just isn’t room between my legs for a cage, or what, but the bulge created was never going to be inconspicuous in a million years!

I guess you could also try pointing out things like you have better orgasms when you haven’t cum for a few days. But I really wouldn’t try to have ‘that conversation’ without laying the foundations first. Let us know how you get on and what approach you took, I’m sure a lot of my other readers would be interested to know.

7 thoughts on “Initiating Chastity…

  1. I’ll try. As you said, it is not a “simple/one conversation” thing. But i’ll try to keep things going… The girl i’m with is obviously interested in dominance role during sex. Let us see if I can keep giving her elements and producing moments when and where she can make flourish this side of her sexual personality. (Sorry for this and the last comment if there is any english mistakes, this is not my born language, so…)

    • Hi P/S
      I think it’s a good sign that she’s already willing to experiment, but chastity is a weird thing for a woman to get her head around, so don’t be surprised or disheartened if she doesn’t ‘get it’ straight away. It was quite a slog for us in the beginning, but I’m glad we stuck it out.

  2. If I may suggest, you could write something with a dense description of the feelings and sensations about long-period privation of orgasm and chastity. I don’t know. Sincerely, most of the time things I read about such subjects are simply predictable and boring. Your writing, on the other hand, makes much more stimulated. Less “common-sense” and more nuanced. Anyway, keep going! Loved it (and dedicated some time particularly reading your “orgasm tracker” section. Could you share with me what are your goal? What you intent to achieve?)

  3. Hi Robert, Potential Submissive,
    I would suggest you do have the talk. Pick a time where you won’t be interrupted for a bit and go for it. I approached my Queen with a ready made contract. As she read it she began to understand what I was looking for. She agreed to try it out and we were off. We have signed two contracts now. The first was only 2.5 months and then we took a break. The second started last June 6. It is to go till the end of next January (though I hope to get an extension long before then). But the biggest deal was her having the knowledge of what it actually was about. I wear my custom steel cage to work. Occasionally I please my wife while still caged. It is a truly hot experience. I wish you luck as you move forward.

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