Potential submissive wrote: “If I may suggest, you could write something with a dense description of the feelings and sensations about long-period privation of orgasm and chastity. I don’t know. Sincerely, most of the time things I read about such subjects are simply predictable and boring. Your writing, on the other hand, makes much more stimulated. Less “common-sense” and more nuanced. Anyway, keep going! Loved it (and dedicated some time particularly reading your “orgasm tracker” section. Could you share with me what are your goal? What you intent to achieve?”
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One of my goals was for the ratio between Mistress R’s number of orgasms and mine to be 10:1, and that has been achieved now. I don’t think it’s necessary to keep increasing that, it’s more important that MR decides, and if that’s more or less it’s up to her.
Another goal was for Mistress to ruin orgasms, because if you are going to have long term chastity then you need to have ruined orgasms one way or another. Again, it took a long time, but Mistress has got her head around that now and seems to be on board with doing that too.
I think there’s a lot of shit written on the internet about chastity and the effects of it. I’ve only gone 72 days, so I can’t speak for those who have gone much longer, but I certainly didn’t feel like I was walking around with a permanent ache. But then again you have to remember I am 47 years old, I can’t imagine what it would have been like to go 72 days when I was 25.
I find the effects are VERY noticeable when aroused, but otherwise are reasonably subdued. Sure I might wake up with some massive wood when I’ve been denied a while, but it’s nothing that can’t be coped with. On the other hand, being edged when you haven’t cum for several weeks/months is a lot more intense, although perhaps more mentally than physically.
I found there was stages to this that once you go through them you change your feelings about them. At first when I was only being denied for 10 days or so, I wanted it to go longer and was ‘disappointed’ when I was allowed to cum. Once this got to a certain point, I think you start to change your mind and want to cum, while at the same time wanting to set new ‘records’.
I must admit I now don’t really care about records and I don’t feel that I need to beat my record. It’s more important that Mistress R controls my orgasms and decides when I get to cum, and really I think once you get to this stage it’s better, because it’s more fun if you ‘want’ to cum, than if you don’t.
I think a lot of my goals have shifted onto different areas now, such as the ‘ass worship’ thing. I want Mistress to always feel desired and sexy and to know that she could demand any kind of ‘worship’ at a moment’s notice without fear of rejection.
And while it is a little incompatible with the whole chastity side of our relationship, I do love it when Mistress allows me to cum and makes me lick it up. When I am not allowed to cum for a long time I really start to crave that, at least now with the ruined orgasms that’s not quite such a problem.